Something happened this past Saturday that has finally pissed me off enough that I can’t stay quiet. I was supposed to meet my friend, George (his name isn’t really George, but I will spare him the embarrassment of using his real name), for lunch at a restaurant down in the southern part of town – down near Olathe. The restaurant isn’t important to the story, the important piece of information is that it takes around 35-45 minutes (depending on traffic/construction) to get there from my house.
I arrived a few minutes early and went in and got us a table. The waitress came by and took my drink order, but I told her I was waiting for my friend before I would order any food. A few moments later, I was sipping on a Diet Coke and wondering where George was. He was only a few minutes late, so I thought perhaps he had gotten stuck in traffic and sat back and watched the various TV’s for sports highlights and scores. The waitress came by again and asked if I was still waiting for my friend. I looked at my watch and George was 20 minutes late. I told her I was still waiting and sent a text to my friend to see if he was stuck somewhere. Before I knew it, I had sipped through the remainder of my drink and still I had no answer from George. I was concerned about George, who is usually good about getting in touch with me. When the waitress came back around, I was hungry so I ordered and figured when George arrived I would just sit and talk since I might just have my meal finished by that time. I fired off another text to see what was up. In the immortal words of Phil Collins (from the Abacab album), “No reply, there’s no reply at all.”
By the time I had finished eating, I had been sitting in the restaurant for an hour without hearing from George. Now I was still concerned as I ate, but also growing more angry. I paid my bill and apologized to the waitress for taking up one of the tables when I could have just sat at the bar. She was fine with it and told me not to worry about it. As I headed out of the restaurant, I called George and got his voicemail. I left a message asking if he forgot that he was supposed to meet me. I tried to be polite about it, but I think a little anger seeped in. I headed home and, once here, began poking around for ways to update the look of the blog. A few hours later, I got a call from George who, to his credit, apologized for missing lunch. I asked if he was ok and he said he was. O…k…a…y… I asked what happened and he informed me that he got a call to do something else so he did that instead. It wasn’t an emergency, it was just “something else”. I told him I was glad he was ok and hung up. I was pissed. Truth be told, I’m still a bit pissed about being blown off and wasting a little over 2 hours. I could have gone to meet another friend, but I had to decline and informed them that I had other plans and asked to meet up another time.
The next time I speak to George, I will tell him this, “Let’s make a deal. If you respect me and my time, I will respect you and yours. If you aren’t going to be able to meet me, please have the common courtesy to at least inform me that your plans have changed so I don’t sit around waiting for you for hours. I promise I will do the same for you. We’re all busy people and we often have things that pop up, so please just tell me. Call me. Text me. Whatever. I’m an adult, I understand things happen. Don’t just blow me off thinking, ‘Ah, he’ll be ok’ (if you even give it a second thought that is), because the next time I might not be so polite. In fact, there might not even be a next time as I will wonder if I can trust you to do what you say (likely I won’t be rude and say that out loud, but I will think it). Once again, I will respect you and your time if you will respect me and mine. Thanks!”
While I’m thinking about it, on a somewhat related note…
If I ask you (friend, co-worker, relative, random person I just met who says you really want to see a show) if you’re coming to see a show, please don’t say yes if you have no intention whatsoever of doing so. If you have other things to do or are just saying “Yeah, we really want to come see you” because you think it’s the polite thing to do, that’s ok, just be honest. Again, I’m an adult and understand if you don’t want to see the show. Not everyone does. Thanks.
